A Mary or Martha - Things I Appreciate About My Mother

A Mary or a Martha -

Things I Appreciate about My Mother

A sermon delivered by Rev. Dr. Randy K. Hammer, May 12, 2019

Isaiah 66:12-13; Luke 10:38-42 ESV

Mother’s Day observances have changed dramatically over the decades; they have, at least, from my frame of reference.  You see, when I was a child in Sunday school, Mother’s Day was one of the two most important getting-dressed-up days of the church year, second only to Easter.  On Mother’s Day my little brother and I had to wear our best white shirt and dress pants, our one and only sports jacket, and a cute little bowtie or clip-on necktie.  And in those days it was customary for everyone to wear a rose in their jacket lapel (if you were a boy or man) or pinned to your dress (if you were a girl or woman).  And the proper rose etiquette was if your mother was still living you wore a red rose, but if your mother had passed on, you wore a white rose.

Once we arrived at church, we had a special Mother’s Day program, which had been planned and rehearsed for a couple of weeks in advance, which was held at the end of the Sunday school hour and before the “Preaching Service.”  The program began with an appropriate hymn for Mother’s Day, and then all the Sunday school children recited their assigned Mother’s Day speeches that we had to memorize for this special occasion.  The youngest children got a short, two-liner speech, and the older children were given longer, 8 to 10-liner speeches.  And one by one, starting with the youngest Sunday school class and working our way up to the oldest class, we would march from the pew and onto the pulpit platform to recite our speeches, all extolling our love and appreciation for mother.

Then in the early afternoon, our family would drive the four miles to my maternal grandparents’ church, where my mother had grown up, for their annual Mother’s Day program and cemetery decoration.  We would stand around in the cemetery with extended family members and friends, talking and inspecting and admiring the sea of floral arrangements that had been lovingly placed on the graves of loved ones.  Then just before 2 o’clock we would make our way into the country church sanctuary for their special Mother’s Day/Decoration Day program.  Again, hymns or gospel songs appropriate to Mother’s Day – such as “Come Home, Come Home, It’s Suppertime” – were sung and appropriate poems were read and prayers were prayed.  After the benediction, it was back out to the cemetery to talk and admire some more flowers.  As I said, times and Mother’s Day observances certainly have changed.

The ways in which we observe Mother’s Day today may be quite different than it was when we were children, and it certainly is different from the way it was when Mother’s Day was first observed some 150 years ago.  But one thing that hasn’t changed is the appreciation that we all have and want to express for mothers, grandmothers and mother figures in our lives.

In thinking about an appropriate text for another Mother’s Day sermon, the story about Jesus’ friends, Mary and Martha, came to mind, especially as I thought about my own mother.  Now, the text does not say or even imply that either Mary or Martha was a mother, or even married for that matter.  I have always had in mind that Mary, Martha, and their brother Lazarus were three siblings who continued to live together, perhaps in the home of their deceased parents.  Yet, whether Mary and Martha were mothers or not, they serve as worthy representatives of women in a broad stroke-of-the-brush sort of way.

As the story relates it, there seems to have been a bit of tension between the two sisters.  Martha was the worker bee of the two, at least on this one particular occasion.  Martha was the food preparer, the cook, and the server.  Martha felt the responsibility of making sure everyone in the household was fed, and most likely, taken care of in every other way as well.  I am guessing that in addition to making sure the meals were prepared and spread on the table, that if the floor got swept, Martha did it.  If the clothes were washed and dried, Martha did it.  Martha concerned herself with much serving.  And contrary to the slanted juxtaposition that often characterizes interpretations of this story, being concerned with much serving is a good thing!  It is a wonderful thing!  Thank God for all those among us – like our wonderful Fellowship Committee and Memorial Reception Committee members – who are concerned or distracted with much serving!  We could not do without them!  So thanks to all of them!

And when I think of my own Mother, I realize she is a Martha.  Well, her name is Shirley, but in spirit she is a Martha.  My own mother has spent her life concerned with serving others.  My mother is the one who gets up early to make sure everyone has breakfast to eat.  And no sooner has she gotten breakfast over with and the breakfast dishes cleaned up than she starts lunch.  And after lunch it is starting preparations for dinner.  And if the floors get swept or vacuumed, Mom does it.  If the clothes get washed and dried, Mom does it.  Mom, like Martha, has devoted the majority of her life to serving others.  And as her son, I stand in great appreciation for that.

But then there was sister, Mary.  Mary, at least on this one occasion, had no interest in 

preparing and serving.  Mary’s interest was in hearing, reflecting upon, and absorbing the teachings of Jesus.  But being devoted to listening and learning from Jesus is a good thing too.  The world needs devoted Marys just as the world needs serving Marthas.

But today I chose to take the thought one step further.  Why does being a serving Martha or a devoted Mary have to be exclusive?  Why can’t a mother or a woman in general or any of us, for that matter, be both?  Why can’t any of us give ourselves in service to others, but also “sit at the feet of Jesus,” in a manner of speaking, as a learner?

My mother certainly is.  When my mother sits down to rest from all her serving, one may likely as not find her reading the Bible or some other devotional book.  Soon after Mary Lou and I got married, we bought my parents a large print Bible for their wedding anniversary or some other special occasion.  My Mom has undoubtedly read through that Bible more times than she herself could count.  It is getting worn and ragged with years of use, but she loves it still. 

And that is another thing I appreciate about my Mom – her spiritual inclinations and the religious devotion at the core of her being.  And I would like to think that I have inherited from my Mom something of her servant spirit and religious devotion.  Perhaps it is for many of us, as it is for me and as writer Mitch Albom notes in his book For One More Day, “behind all your stories is your mother’s story, for hers is where yours begins.”

Now, as noted earlier, Mother’s Day observances have changed dramatically over the 

decades.  But so have expectations.  Roles in the household are changing as well.  We no longer expect that the woman of the house will be responsible for all the household tasks of cooking, serving, cleaning, etc.  We have moved toward more equality and sharing household chores.  And that is a good thing too.

But I wonder out loud if two of the defining characteristics of being a Christian, or of living a spiritual life in general, whatever one’s religious leanings, should be serving and learning; learning and serving; giving our lives in service to others as much as we able with the opportunities that have been given to us, and exercising devoted listening as we seek to learn and shape our lives around the teachings of sacred texts.

If that is true, then the dispositions and passions of Mary and Martha blended together would

 make for the perfect specimen of a well-balanced life – a devoted listener and learner and a faithful servant to others.  May it be so for each of us, as much as it is within our power to do so.  Amen.