Identity Struggles

A sermon delivered by Rev. Dr. Randy K. Hammer, March 17, 2019

Luke 4:1-13 GNT

Five of us from this United Church are participating in a four-part Holocaust study that is a joint effort between the Jewish Congregation of Oak Ridge, the Unitarian Universalist Church, First Presbyterian Church, and our United Church.  The study group met for two hours the first two Sunday afternoons of March, and it will meet for two hours the first two Sunday afternoons of April, with the culmination being the Holocaust Remembrance Service in May.  The study includes pre-class readings, viewing videos and PowerPoint presentations, lectures, and group discussions as we learn more about the circumstances and social dynamics that made possible that horrible period of history that took the lives of millions of Jews, mentally and physically disabled people, certain ethnic groups and others that were deemed by the Nazis as being less-than-human and not worthy to live.  It is a very interesting, yet quite disturbing, experience, to say the least.

But one of the topics we have explored is the issue of identity and the tremendous role that identity played in the determination of who was worthy to keep living and who was not.  The Nazis developed very elaborate key charts based upon one’s ancestors and family of origin, eye color, physical characteristics, and so on to determine people’s identity.  And those who failed the test were branded as being not worthy to live and were sent to the gas chambers and furnaces.

But another aspect of the issue has to do with those affected by the Holocaust and their own sense of identity and choices that often had to be made in seeking to hide their true identity, converting or lying about their true identity, or being proudly open about their true identity, and as a result suffering the consequences, which in effect meant concentration camps and/or death.

Identity – it is a very personal issue.  And it is a much greater issue for some than it is for others.  I realize – and one of the exercises we did in the Holocaust study reinforced this – that as a white male of European descent, personal identity is a much more comfortable issue for me than it is for many of the world.  As a healthy (without disabilities) white male, I have not been subjected to the prejudices, exclusions, stereotyping, persecutions, and so on that many have been subjected to: African American males, people with disabilities, LGBT people, Jewish people, and others.  I have not been ostracized or persecuted because of my race or religion.  White privilege – though I believe white privilege is wrong – has worked in my favor.  I humbly realized that.  And I do so realizing that for the vast majority of the world things are quite different.  This is to say that for those of us who are Caucasian or white, for the most part we have not had to struggle much with ethnic identity issues.

Nevertheless, regardless of what our Ancestry.com DNA tests may reveal regarding our race or ethnic heritage, many of us may still struggle with identity issues of some sort.

Enter Jesus and his forty-day temptation and vision quest in the wilderness.  Now, this story most often is read at the beginning of the Lenten season.  And I am guessing that most often the theme or topic lifted out of this story is temptation and how each of us is tempted in some way.

But this year, I read this wilderness story of Jesus from a totally different perspective.  I read it in terms of a struggle of personal identity.  I think that if this story says anything, it says that for forty days Jesus struggled with his identity, his call, his vocation, and his place within the Jewish context.  Three little words that are repeated – “If you are” – served as a common denominator of the struggle Jesus underwent.  “If you are God’s Son” was the core of his struggle.  Was he someone special?  Was he God’s appointed one?  Was he the long-expected deliverer of the Jews?  Was he indeed the “Son of God”?  I feel that we cannot fully appreciate the inner struggle Jesus underwent as he sought to clarify within his own mind and soul just who he really was and what his course of action should be, if indeed he were destined to fill the role prescribed to him.

Was Jesus to be a new lawgiver after the example of Moses – a new Moses for a new age?  Was he to be a social prophet after the manner of Micah and Amos?  Was he to be a revolutionary after the manner of Judas Maccabeus who had led an uprising against Rome some 100 years earlier?  Was he to be a healing prophet after the manner of Elisha?  Or was he to be a suffering servant as prophesied in Isaiah?  What was his particular role to be?  Or was it to be a combination of all of the above, bringing the best of Jewish thought and leadership together in one person?  What a struggle of identity he must have undergone!

I am inclined to wonder if all great leaders endure an identity struggle as they question their attributes, calling, and the role they are to play in the history of the world.  One has to wonder if Mohandas Gandhi, who led the resistance movement in India; or Martin Luther King Jr, who led in the American Civil Rights movement; or German Pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer, who led in the resistance movement against Adolf Hitler; and Dorothea Dix, social advocate of the mentally ill; we can’t help but wonder if they all underwent their own vision quests as they sought to clarify the role they were to play in the affairs of humankind and advocated for positive change in the world.

Although of far less importance than all of those I have mentioned, I endured my own personal struggle of identity as I, for about two years, wrestled with my own sense of personhood and whether or not I was “called” or should pursue Christian ministry.  You see, I grew up in a conservative Christian culture that said certain people were called to the ministry, and unless you had “received the call,” you should not consider it.  So I spent no small amount of time seeking spiritual guidance and trying to determine if I should pursue the ministry, and if I was, to what type of ministry.  Finally those much wiser than I said to me that if one is suitable for ministry, it will be recognized by others and the church will affirm it.  The funny thing is those around you may be aware of the fact that you will choose the course of Christian ministry before you do.  But then some twenty years ago, I experienced another struggle of identity as I wrestled with the decision to transition to another Christian denomination that matched who I had become, as I had grown and changed in my personal beliefs, values, and sense of self.

But a struggle with identity certainly is not limited to public leadership or ministry.  Many women struggle with their identity in a male-dominated workplace.  Young people struggle with their coming of age identity.  LGBT people struggle with their personal identity and how to present themselves to the world.  Minorities struggle with their identity in a white-dominated, English-speaking society.  Many parents struggle with their identity as parents.  Identity struggles are many and varied.

I think one of the messages we should take away from all this is we need to be careful that we don’t stereotype and exclude people (as the Nazis did) based upon their identity.

And if there is any good news to be had regarding the wilderness identity struggles that are common to most all of us at one time or another it is the fact that struggling with identity is universal, albeit some struggles of identity are more critical than others. 

How do we deal with our struggles of identity?  

·        Recognition – recognizing and admitting the struggle;

·        Prayer or meditation – like Jesus, spend time alone in a prayerful or meditative spirit seeking guidance;

·        And sharing – finding a trusted friend or confidant who can lend a listening ear and be a sounding board to help us work through our identity struggle.  Some special friends in my life have been such a confidant for me, Lawrence of Smyrna being one of them. 

Christian tradition says that Jesus suffered his identity struggle alone.  The good news is we don’t have to.  We are blessed to be in a loving, supportive community of faith where we can call on any number of those around us who would be happy to offer a listening ear and emotional support.

A personal sense of identity – we all have one in one form or another. It behooves us to respect the identity of others and to refrain from stereotyping and ostracizing others, as can easily be done today.  And how important it is that we understand and arrive at peace with our own sense of identity, whatever that identity might be.  May it be so.  Amen.